Someone once told me that you really aren’t married until you think about where to hide the body. Marriage is not easy. When I hear people say that are married because it is “convenient,” I look at them and wonder if they get their toenails pulled out because it is the easiest way to have a pedicure. Marriage is not easy, even in the best of times. In tough times (financial, emotional, or physical), it is even tougher.
I had the wonderful opportunity to go to the San Francisco Writers Conference this past weekend. Incredibly inspirational, wonderful people, and left completely energized! One of my conversations had got me thinking about what it means to pursue your passion in life.
Ever wonder how some women can make the most of every moment while others seem to be running around in a time starved void? Their secret: These women have found a way to stop chasing after the never ending to do list in life and starting living it. They are real women. These women work, have families, volunteer, and enjoy every step along the way. They are regular people who have taken the ordinary and made it extraordinary. Their attitude in life has taken the mundane and make it marvelous. I started my career at GE and then moved on to Silicon Valley during the uber-tech boom from 1996-2002, so I know what “stressed-out” means, and it takes a lot to change my innate sense of having to complete to do lists on an hourly basis. My wonderful mentor once told me that “this is the small stuff”. I finally get it. All the checklists, all the step by step plans on how to have a perfect life, and all the competitiveness of trying to be (or at least seem to nr) perfect is the small stuff. It is time for me to stop and smell the roses. I listened to David Morrell (creator of Rambo) speak today and he said “all we have is time”. I could not agree more. All we have is time. We can waste it in our to do file or use it to live a life we love.
Over the last 19 days, we have seen Egypt cut off Internet access, bloggers jailed in Syria, and a new Facebook-driven protest in Iran. We can also communicate our ideas, fears, dreams, and talents to anyone and everyone who will listen (or read them). Isn’t it wonderful that we can live in a place where everyone can say what we feel? Let’s not abuse this privilege. Blogging has a dark side too.
As we are getting ready to bring our second son (little W) home from Ethiopia, I have been thinking quite a bit about the type of children I want to raise and the type of parent I want to be. Even with a doctorate in Human Systems, my first son (big W) has had 4 years of trial and error parenting. I think of my first child, who has had the best medical care and anything he has ever needed (or wanted) since the day he was born, and wonder how both he and I can learn from my second son who is still halfway across the globe.